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I Flipped A Coin To Decide... Then Ignored Every Answer

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Dear Readers,

For one week, I ran a small experiment. Every time I felt genuinely stuck on a decision, I flipped a coin. Heads one way, tails the other. The rule was that I did not have to obey it. I only had to notice what happened in me the moment it landed.

The coin never made a single decision for me. But something interesting kept happening. In the half-second before it landed, I already knew which side I was hoping for. Relief or disappointment arrived before the answer did.

It made me wonder how often I already know. I think we ask for signs when we have quietly chosen, and what we really want is permission. The list-making, the polling of friends, the waiting for one more piece of information. Sometimes that is diligence. Sometimes it is just delay dressed up as diligence.

So here is my practice now. When I catch myself hunting for a sign, I stop and ask a different question. Not what should I do. What am I hoping the answer will be. The hoping is usually the answer, and it was there before the coin ever left my thumb.

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I still make the occasional list. I just trust the tuning fork a little more now.

β€” Alex

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